Date: Fri, 29 Jun 2001 11:46:39 EDT
Reply-To: SBWC919@AOL.COM
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: Brian McClure <SBWC919@AOL.COM>
Subject: Illinois emission test foolisness( semi long)
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="US-ASCII"
Hi all- just got finished taking my emission test. Boy what a screwed up
mess!
First off- they tried to test it as a front wheel drive! I resisted
temptation to not tell them and let them drive it through the garage door-but
common sense took over, and i advised them of their danger. Station manager
says"oh- the computer says its front wheel drive." Then mumbles something
else and walks away to his air conditioned office- to eat banannas and
scratch his privates with the rest of the monkeys.(I hesitate to call them
monkeys, as this might offend some monkeys i know)
So next, the test ape gets it on the dyno,again- this time on the right
wheels, and proceeds to redline it in each gear. He tells me" i cant get it
to go 65"
This is after i am in the waiting booth, and can clearly see the big red
BRAKE light on. Seems he was trying to pull the dyno load and the load of the
emergency brake that he forgot to turn off!
So after that, Coco or what ever the managers name was comes back. "what
seems to be the problem?" He asks around a mouthfull of monkey chow or
something.
I tell him that Chaka his loyal emnployee is testing my van with the brake
on.
He says" oh sorry, he is new." Then wanders back to his cage to play on the
tire swing.
So finally they finish the test. The Subie motor passes with flying colors!
( this could be because i somehow forgot to tell them that this wasnt the
stock VW motor-my bad!)
Unfortunatly my gas cap failed miserably. So now I have to find a new cap.
Oh well, clean air truimphs again. Wooo wooo......
They only tested my van for HC and CO. the rest of the test is not
applicable for my year.
Guess I didnt need that expensive cat converter......
Also Illinois residents if your van wont pull the load- make surew the
emergency brake is off! Also the correct dyno settings, listed in the test
information section is 19.9 4000.
They originally tried it at 19.9- 6000 i think. I think the 6000 might be
the load on the dyno in pounds.
Lets hear it for the Illinois Clean Air team!!! :-P~ PHHHHTTTTT
Brian
Blood pressure almost normal now
83 Urabus
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