Date:         Fri, 24 Aug 2001 22:17:16 -0500
Reply-To:     Terry Kay <CTONLINE@WEBTV.NET>
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From:         Terry Kay <CTONLINE@WEBTV.NET>
Subject:      This One Top's Them All
Content-Type: Text/Plain; Charset=US-ASCII

Hey All,

Let me go back to June, when I originally reported on the horror story
of the Illinois Environmental Protection Agency testing my 85 GL,
beating the heck ou of it running it up to the max on the roller's for a
good 20 minutes, and then handing me a piece of paper, stating that
Delilah didn't have the horsepower required to be tested.

I wrote the whole deal off------

Until yesterday, when in the mail, I received a final testing notice,
simply stating that get it tested or lose my license.

The testing station is 2 blocks from work, and I figure to go and grab
the manager, and read him some sort of confusing riot act, and he will
just give me a pass.

I told him that his tester wrongfully pre loaded the roller's with
erroneous information, which caused my van to fail.

He told me that he never heard of anything like this, and take the van
to lane #2

The young girl there who checks the vin #, and gas cap said "Hi--I
remember you and this van, because we don't have a gas cap adapter to
test your cap"
How nice---
" Please get out of your vehicle and wait in the waiting room"---

"No way" says I --I'm going with for the ride, to see what in the hell
went on last time---the guy said the van wouldn't go over 40 mph, and I
drive it all the time at 70--75.

"Ok, no problem", and I jump to the passenger seat, she drives it up on
the roller's, and asks me on the way if this thing is front wheel
drive------NO,it isn't.

She get's out, and this young guy gets in and I explain my dilemma, and
also tell him about what had happened at my prior test.

He say's hmmm---and continues to grab this button box and jump on the
throttle----

I watch and I''ll be darned the thing is running at 30 mph, for about 30
seconds, and he puts the brakes on .

He does the same thing this time raising the speed to about 45 mph, for
about 30 seconds and then stops again-----"Ok you pass"

"How in the hell did this thing pass so quick when it took that goof (
pointing at the young lad that abused my vehicle 2 months prior.) 20
minutes to tell me my toilet has not enough horsepower to be tested?

"Oh, he was a trainee then---he probably didn't know what he was doing
at that time"---

Oh good, I'm thinking.

"Next time you bring any of your vehicles here to this station, find me,
I know what I'm doing"----

Well isn't this just special---- How in the hell is one to know who is
and who isn't qualified?

Anyway, the best part is I passed, and passed with flying colors, and
the whip cream on the key-lime pie is I passed with a totally empty,
nada, zero, zip converter.

I was just looking to fail the test to buy me some more time, to get it
passable----

PTL, and Hallelujah---

TK has done it again---

I'm now good till 8 / 2003 !!!

So the moral of the story is---ask questions, act concerned, bitch a
little, confuse them with some sort of Wizard of Oz technical data, and
ask for a qualified testing technician, when you take your vehicle to
get flogged upon, for the EPA.


Later,

            ______________
           |[  ] [  ] [ ]\
           |    |    |    |
     ~~~ ~||-(())----(())-|

Terry--
74 Campmobile- (Clementine)
85 GL- (Delilah)
86 BMW 325 ES- (Eva)