Date: Thu, 30 Aug 2001 20:02:08 -0700
Reply-To: mike miller <mwmiller@CWNET.COM>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: mike miller <mwmiller@CWNET.COM>
Subject: Re: Friday Foolishness
In-Reply-To: <20010830.180646.-373067.6.wilden1@juno.com>
Content-type: text/plain; charset="US-ASCII"
Spreading Mick's stuff probably comes under the virus ban.
Or should.
Mike
purer than the driven snow.
> From: Stan Wilder <wilden1@JUNO.COM>
> Reply-To: Stan Wilder <wilden1@JUNO.COM>
> Date: Thu, 30 Aug 2001 18:06:46 -0500
> To: vanagon@GERRY.VANAGON.COM
> Subject: Friday Foolishness
>
> Oh, here are a few for you... These came from Mick in Hilo
>
> Here are the reasons engineers are so cool (or think they are)...
>
> Reason No. 1
>
> Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said,
> "Where did you get such a great bike?"
>
> The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday
> minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike.
> She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes, and said,
> "Take what you want."
>
> "The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes
> probably wouldn't have fit."
>
> No. 2
>
> To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass
> is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs
> to be.
>
> No. 3
>
> A pastor, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
> particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with
> these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!"
>
> The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such
> ineptitude!"
>
> The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greenskeeper. Let's have a word
> with him."
>
> "Hi, John. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather
> slow, aren't they?"
>
> The greenskeeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind
> firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire
> last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."
>
> The group was silent for a moment.
>
> The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer
> for them tonight."
>
> The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my
> ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."
>
> The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"
>
> No. 4
>
> There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all
> things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for more than 30
> years, he happily retired. Several years later, the company contacted
> him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with
> one of their multimillion-dollar machines.
>
> They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine to
> work but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired
> engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past. The
> engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the
> huge machine. At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk
> on a particular component of the machine and stated, "This is where
> your problem is."
>
> The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. The
> company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his
> service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges.
>
> The engineer responded: "One chalk mark: $1; knowing where to put it:
> $49,999."
>
> It was paid in full and the engineer retired again in peace.
>
> No. 5
>
> What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
>
> Mechanical engineers build weapons; civil engineers build targets.
>
> **********
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