Date: Fri, 7 Sep 2001 14:46:01 -0700
Reply-To: Joseph Fortino <fortino1@ONEBOX.COM>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: Joseph Fortino <fortino1@ONEBOX.COM>
Subject: friday funny
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
hoping this isnt spam for some.
CODE WORDS.
Area 51 - The smoking area at work.
Attitude Adjustment (You need an) - What you tell someone who needs to
have sex to put them in a better mood.
Aunt Flo's Visiting - A woman's time of the month.
Bat in the Cave - Term for when someone has a booger hanging out of the
nose in plain sight.
Butterhead - Woman with great body, without a nice face to match... everything's
great "but her head."
Butterface - see Buitterhead
Cash My Check (Can you) - Bank lingo for when a man asks a woman if she
wants to get it on.
Cat has a Nosebleed, The - A prettier way for women to say it's their
special time.
Cloak the Captain - To put on a condom.
Crop Dusting - Walking through a room, slowly releasing a fart.
Dance Recital - Otherwise known as a Strip Club.
Date with BOB - When your social life is a little slow, you may stay
home and have a date with your Battery Operated Boyfriend.
Dilligaf - Short-hand for the otherwise long phrase "Do I look like I
give a f***.
Dropping the Kids Off at the Pool - Going to the bathroom to do #2.
Duff - Designated, Ugly, Fat, Friend. The fat girl who is always hanging
out with a group of nicer looking ladies.
Elvis is in the Building - Elvis visits women every 28 days... more female
cycle jargon.
Executive Lounge (The)- The restroom at work that is not visited by many
people, thus much cleaner.
Fad - When you see a woman that only looks good "From a distance."
Freat - A future treat... or, the description of a young girl who is
with her parents that might think you are a bit too old for her.
Getting Ned - The act of giving... eh, you can figure this one out.
Going to Georgia - When you go down "South" to pleasure a woman... in,
uh, that way.
Going to Get a Cheeseburger - Drinking beer at lunch during work.
Going to Virginia - Going to smoke some weed.
Has Eye Trouble (He/She) - Answer given when someone suspiciously calls
in to work. Derived from Person 'couldn't see' coming to work.
Helen Harper - In honor of a Dutch tampon, it's more slang for a woman's
period.
Hiding the Candy - Yet another slang term for menstruation (Because tampon
wrappers look like Clark Bars).
Lima Beans - Playing with some one's butt. This is because you may like
lima beans... but only every once in awhile.
Little Crack Head - A man who pleasures a woman... in, uh, that way.
Make a Deposit (Do you want to) - Bank lingo for when a woman asks a
man to do "the deed."
M.I.L.T.F - Pronounced "milph," this is an acronym for describing a mother
I'd like to f*** (Also has the title of "most submitted code word ever!")
Meeting With the Boys - The male version of self pleasure.
Monthly, The - Pizza slang for a pie with Pepperoni, Mushroom, and Sausage
(PMS).
Mouse in the House - A very interesting term for telling people when
a woman has her period.
Mr. Resneck - Jewelry store code for a suspected shoplifter.
Parachute - Another word for a quickie... because you are allowing the
man to just drop in, and land.
PFM - An answer to the question "how did that happen?" meaning Pure Frigin'
Magic
Pink Taco - Classy description of female genitalia.
Redwood - A promiscuous woman, in reference to the redwood tree having
a hole so big you can drive a truck through it.
Ringer - Deep in the coal mines of Utah, this is coveted title of a man
who has had sex 7 nights in a row.
Short Between the Seat and the Steering Wheel (To Have A) - Mechanics
term for when the only problem with the car is the driver.
Smakin' Clams - Lesbian sex
Summer Teeth - A person with bad teeth. When "summer" here, and "summer"
there.
Taking Care of Some Paper Work - Another phrase for #2 in the bathroom.
Taking the Kids Skydiving - Farting
Talking to Pedro - See "Getting Ned."
Ted - T.E.D. twenty-eight days... a woman's period.
Tossing Johnny from the Boat - A very playful name for #2.
Training Films Dealing With Blocked Airways and Impaled Orifices - Name
for Pornos being watched at a fire station.
Turkey's Done, The - When it's cold and a female's nipples are erect.
Two-Pump Chump - A man who doesn't last that long in bed.
Verify the Vault - Bank lingo to ask a co-worker to find a quiet place
and "do it."
Wears Comfortable Shoes - Phrase used to say someone is gay.
Weed Eating - Another phrase for pleasuring a woman... in, uh, that way.
What was Chelsea thinking? - A nice way of asking "what was that woman
thinking when she put that on this morning?"
White Trash Trio - In hospitals, it's a Loritab prescription, a cab pass
and a work release note.
WPMS Radio - More slang for the female cycle.
Yard Work - The act of mating.
--
Joseph Fortino
fortino1@onebox.com - email
(510) 360 -7829 voicemail/fax
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