Date: Sun, 16 Sep 2001 23:28:01 -0500
Reply-To: Joel Walker <jwalker17@EARTHLINK.NET>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: Joel Walker <jwalker17@EARTHLINK.NET>
Organization: not likely
Subject: Re: Looking for a Vanagon kind of wife
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1"
> Hey,,,this is also for the Vanagon Women,,...we do not want just any
ole
> mechanical type guys....they have to be sensative,
well ... does cursing a blue streak when you cut/hit your thumb count
as "sensitive"?? :)
>caring
oh, i definitely care. i care about food, money, buses, tires, buses,
luggage rack seals, buses, weed eaters, stupid pine straw that covers
my yard, kudzu, food, money, buses, weather, price of gasoline ....
lots of stuff. :)
>and loaded with lots of money to finance all those trips...
ah.
well.
ok, you got me on that one. :(
>and hey ..if they can afford a new Eurovan I would call that a
definate plus...
sheesh!! there's a new silver 7-passenger Eurovan, sitting on the
local dealer's lot. 200hp v6, disc brakes front AND rear ... ONLY
$27,000!! (he'll probably take a lot less ... the last one sat on his
lot for 14 months!). i was going to go hassle the salescum and test
drive it yesterday, but managed to pull a muscle in my back while
mowing the lawn. :(
>I could be a Eurovan wife fairly easily...
hmmm. kinda wishy-washy, ain't yuh?? ;)
>of course, I cannot speak for all the women
> out there ......but I'm here... a matchmaker just waiting for her
> assignment......I expected to come home and find more
> e-mail....geeze...mail in your descriptions and help me with the
Vanagon
> Love List....(descriptions of Vanagons being the most important of
> course)...sb
ok, here goes ...
name: Unca Joel (aka Grumpy, the only one of the seven dwarves to wise
up and get out of that stupid mine. wasn't diamonds anyway,
just quartz. and all that
"hi ho, hi ho" crap was driving me bonkers!).
age: Old as the Hills (snow-covered hills, that is)
race: Not any more. gave it up ... got too many tickets and burned
up too many clutches. too old to go fast anymore. :(
sex: not lately. why do you think i'm looking for a wife!!!????
body type: somewhat endomorphic mesomorph. :) kinda like a 5-4-1
hobbies: listening to music, working on vanagons, driving vanagons,
looking for
vanagons on the internet.
education: able to read and write Ameri-English; can also speak it,
but with
(some folks say) slight decernable Suthern accent. can mimic
genuine
English (London area) accent, as well as Australian (Sydney area)
accent.
not real good on the German accent. French and Italian are
pitiful.
got my 3R's (reading, riting, rednecking) in Alabama; managed to
matriculate
my way through a state university in only 13 years (time out for
an extended sabbatical tour of southeast Asia, studying
its culture, peoples, flora, fauna,
and various means of destruction there unto). am able to read
street signs, maps, AND ask for directions! :)
religious affiliation: no. they all seem to want my money.
military service: Army. seemed like a long time to me.
means of support: working as pitiful computer support semi-geek for
that same state university; used to be computer programmer til
mainframes and Cobol went out
of style. :(
annual income: barely enough to keep three buses, a lawn mower, a weed
eater (with small bush blade), and a chain saw running. oh, and
provide sufficient calories to
maintain my corpulent figure. still paying for foolish mistakes,
of various types, in the past.
but enough about me ... here's what *I*'m looking fer!!!!
name: i'm pretty flexible on this ... but wimmen named Adolf or Butch
are waaaay
down on my list of 'possibles'!!!
age: somewhat close to my own age. don't want nobody younger than 45
or 50.
i find it very frustrating, trying to carry on a conversation with
people who have no idea who Franklin Roosevelt or Nikita
Khrushchev were, much less Cotton Mather, Herman Melville, and
such folks as those.
race: nope. don't want nobody wearing them funny overalls and helmets
and
googles running loose in MY house!
sex: hopefully!!! :) but none of that hot-monkey stuff ... my back
won't take it.
body type: hmmm. preferably ectomorphic. petite. someone who does not
tower
over me and my buses. but tall enough to climb into a bus by her
lonesome.
strong enough to tote farwood and laundry. :)
hobbies: almost anything BUT singing and/or playing of certain musical
instruments
(even if practiced!! tuba players are especially NOT wanted).
cooking would be
a nice plus (otherwise, we gwin be eating out a lot).
education: able to read and write in at least English or
Ameri-English; some college
preferred; graduate degrees count against ya.
religious affiliation: i tolerate most religions, so long as they
ain't asking for money
or my soul, and worship doesn't involve snakes or chickens or a
lot of hopping
up and down and around.
military service: ok by me. as long as she doesn't/didn't outrank me
(i ain't saluting
nobody anymore).
means of support: yes, that would be helpful. very helpful.
annual income: oh, a couple of million a year ought to do it. :)
other specifications ...
a. orphans and only-children given preference. don't want no in-laws
at my age.
b. must have own bus. ain't getting none of mine. if it's not a
camper, she can have
the garage, though.
c. can't have feet (or biceps) bigger than mine. i've got size 10
feet. biceps are
smaller.
d. can't have more facial hair than me. that includes nose and ears.
e. no tattoos bigger than a quarter. and none visible when wearing
bathing suits.
f. hair should not be longer than shoulder-length (too much chance of
getting
it caught in the fan belts. i hate it when that happens).
soooo ... anybody interested?? :)
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