Date: Fri, 25 Jan 2002 10:17:35 -0800
Reply-To: mike miller <mwmiller@CWNET.COM>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: mike miller <mwmiller@CWNET.COM>
Subject: Re: Punny Stuff - Friday fun -no Vanagon content
In-Reply-To: <3C5153BC.28448.3C5513@localhost>
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May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.
And, no, they didnšt get betterš as they go.
> From: Malcolm Stebbins <MSTEBBIN@MSVU1.MSVU.CA>
> Organization: Mount Saint Vincent University
> Reply-To: Malcolm Stebbins <MSTEBBIN@MSVU1.MSVU.CA>
> Date: Fri, 25 Jan 2002 12:46:51 -0400
> To: vanagon@GERRY.VANAGON.COM
> Subject: Punny Stuff - Friday fun -no Vanagon content
>
>
> These get better as they go:
>
> Punny Stuff
>
> 1. Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The
> stewardess looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion
> allowed per passenger."
>
> 2. Two boll weevils grew up in West Virginia. One went to Hollywood and
> became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never
> amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two
> weevils.
>
> 3. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in
> the craft, it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat
> it, too.
>
> 4. A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to
> the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
>
> 5. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
> He wanted to transcend dental medication.
>
> 6. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the
> lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the
> manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they
> asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts
> boasting in an open foyer."
>
> 7. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a
> family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain;
> they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his
> birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she
> wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins!
> If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
>
> 8. These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a
> small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from
> the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was
> unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went
> back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist
> hired Hugh Taggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade"
> them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be
> back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving
> that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
>
> 9. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which
> produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little,
> which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad
> breath. This made him ....what? (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good) A super
> callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
>
> 10. And finally, there was a man who sent ten different puns to friends, with
> the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. Unfortunately,
> no pun.... in ten did.
>
>
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