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Date:         Wed, 13 Feb 2002 02:45:01 -0600
Reply-To:     Max Wellhouse <maxjoyce@IPA.NET>
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From:         Max Wellhouse <maxjoyce@IPA.NET>
Subject:      Re: Vanagon Olympics [was: Robbed !]
Comments: To: Tobin Copley <tobin.copley@UBC.CA>
In-Reply-To:  <v0422080bb88f20eb0ce2@[207.23.94.149]>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"; format=flowed

You're forgetting the Posturepedic Pushup contest in the back of the westfalia. Seperate class for GL Weekenders. Seismic instruments under the tires will determine the winner.

DM&FS

At 12:15 PM 2/12/2002 -0800, Tobin Copley wrote: >At 11:13 PM -0800 2/11/02, Al Knoll wrote: >>If you have to keep score it's a game. >> >>If you need a judge it's a pastime. >> >>If you need several judges it's a sham. >> >>The only real sports are motor racing, bull fighting and extreme skiing, all >>the others are mere games, or worse. > >Indeed! Let's start the Ist Vanagon Olympiad. Since the Olympics >are such an enormous corporate cash cow, we should easily be able to >get massive Corp. sponsorship--enough for Vanagon calendars for >everybody! > >The Opening ceremonies would have hundreds of rusty dented Vanagons >from all over the world filing into a huge stadium. The track would >soon be slick with leaky oil and spilt antifreeze. The American >vanagons would be so plastered with American flag bumper stickers >they wouldn't need to carry a separate flag. The climax of the >ceremony would be the lighting of the Olympic flame, in which a >screaming young man would run into the stadium on fire because he >spilled gasoline on his hot trouble lamp while replacing a rusty gas >tank. He would run up a long flight of stairs and jump into a >Vanagon high up on a pedestal--it would instantly burst into flames >when a shorting starter circuit ignites the leaky high-pressure fuel >lines. Very moving. > >Over the next week, events would include: > >Breaker bar competition: >------------------------ >Removing the big rear wheel nut using an 18" breaker bar (women's >competition uses a 24" breaker bar). > >Vanagon push-start competition: >------------------------------- >A two person team must push start a fully laden syncro Westfalia on a >100m track. In the final medal competition, this is done uphill on a >2% incline. > >Stalled Vanagon Super-G slalom: >------------------------------- >A fully laden Syncro Westfalia idles at the start gate until, at the >start signal, the coil wire is pulled. A two person team pushes the >Vanagon off the start platform to a running start, then hops in and >pilots the Vanagon down a steep and twisty 3 km roadway without power >steering or power brakes. The passenger is in charge of the hand >brake. > >Stalled Vanagon Skeleton "luge": >------------------------------- >Using the same course and configuration as the Super-G above, only >the engine is placed in neutral and the shift linkage uncoupled. > >Transmission bench press: >------------------------- >Removing the transmission from the car single-handedly without the >aid of a floor jack. A bent input shaft results in disqualification. > >Diesel crankshaft bolt removal: >------------------------------- >Remove a stuck crankshaft bolt from a Vanagon diesel engine with the >engine still in the car. Only standard hand tools permitted (Lower >category may permit removal of oil pan and use of a 2x4 with a time >handicap). > >Air-cooled pushrod tube removal and reinstallation: >--------------------------------------------------- >No tools other than those used to remove valve covers and rocker arm >assembly permitted. Points lost for denting the tubes. Covert use >of duct-tape wrapping on tubes results in instant disqualification. > >I know there are other competitions, only I can't remember them all >now. If anyone else can think of any I've forgotten, please chime in! > >T. > >------------------------------------------------------------------------- >Tobin Copley Bowen Island, BC, Canada 49deg 23'N-123deg 19'W > >'82 Westfalia 1.6L NA diesel ("Stinky") >'97 son Russell ============= >'99 daughter Margaret /_| |_L| |__|:| clatter > SPEED KILLS! {. .| clatter! > Drive a Vanagon diesel ~-()-==----()-~


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