Date:         Mon, 12 Aug 2002 00:03:39 EDT
Reply-To:     KimBrennan@AOL.COM
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From:         Kim Brennan <KimBrennan@AOL.COM>
Subject:      A tale from the underworld
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="US-ASCII"

So, shortly after my Tiico conversion the valve on the front heat exchanger
decided to choose THAT time to need replacing. Of course, I was testing
everything out after the conversion and that meant...I suddenly had hot feet
in the middle of summer. Since my AC isn't too cool right now, this was far
from a desirable situation.

Not long after, the VW special tie clamps that hold the heater hose from the
engine up above the danger elements like...half axles, decided to break, and
soon, I had a coolant leak on my heater system.

So, not knowing (and not being able to figure out) the special VW part number
for this PARTICULIAR heater hose, I chose to use generic (which doesn't have
the nice bends that the OEM part does). I also wasn't able to find the VW
part number for those afore mentioned tie clamps, so I used generics...when I
could find SOMETHING to attach them too.

Of course, with the generic heater hose, I was getting less coolant up to
that front heat exchanger (which was still putting hot air down to my feet.)
Which meant I was less hot than I could have been.

But finally I started running out of things that could delay attacking the
valve. I mounted the SouthAfrican 15" wheels on the GoldBrick...and that
meant that the spare had to come down (the GoldBrick being a syncro, you
don't mix wheel/tires of differing sizes.) I'll attack the problem of where
to put the spare, another day...but now that the spare tire carrier was
down...it was time to work on that valve.

Getting to the OEM hose clamps was easier than I expected (the upper one was
a little harder to do, but still not too bad.) Popping the cable off also was
easier than I had envisioned. I now went for a change of clothing to old
miserable stuff that I didn't mind getting wet with noxious chemicals. I also
grabbed the goggles thinking... I'll be looking straight up and having things
fall straight down...not a good idea. Then I yanked the hoses off the old
valve and took my shower in coolant as I put the new valve onto the hoses.
Since I now couldn't see through the fogged up goggles, it was time to throw
some water on the spilled coolant and wash myself down a bit before finishing
(such an optimist) the job.

Cooler and marginally cleaner, I started on the the simple stuff. Putting the
hose clamps back onto the hose where the hose was attached to the new valve.
Pretty straight forward, except for the shower of dirt that keeps raining
down into my eyes...where are those goggles again? Ah, clean them up put them
on and lets put that cable onto the valve. Attach the cable to the lever, and
now try to clamp the cable housing to the valve. Drop the clamp spring.
Retry. Repeat a dozen times. At this point the goggles are too fogged for me
to see. Remove goggles. Put clamp spring into the slot on the valve, reroute
cable under clamp move cable housing to appropriate place, drop clamp spring
onto (unprotected) face. Retry. Repeat countless times.

Remove cable from valve lever. Try above again. and again and again. Curse
german engineers who came up with this netherworld experience. Eventually get
clamp in to right position. Grab pliers, start closing the clamp. Spring, off
it comes again. Go find spring. Go find something to put on spare tire
carrier so it stops digging a whole into my lower back. Ah, a movers quilted
blanket. Just the thing. Throw it onto the spare tire carrier and return to
work. Downy soft could fall asleep now that the tempatures are getting
pleasant....whoa, how long have I been doing this?

Reposition work light (again) so it stops dropping on my head, throwing light
into my eyes, or casting shadows on to the area I really need to see. Grab
spring get it just right...the plyers are just out of reach. Bing, there goes
the spring. Get up. Get plyers. Get spring. Lie down. Get up. Go get water.
Lie down. Get up. Go get plyers left on counter when getting water. Lie down.
Reach up. Get up. Reposition light. Lie down. Get up. Get spring. Lie down.
Put spring in valve. Put cable in valve. Close spring with plyers. Snip. Get
cable end with plyers. Put cable end into hole on valve lever.

Congratulations you have just won the great underground empire of Zork...
Oops, wrong tale...

Congratulations. You have just discovered why a simple job gets charged 4
hours of labor at the shop.