Date: Fri, 24 Jan 2003 08:50:14 -0800
Reply-To: Alistair Bell <albell@UVIC.CA>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: Alistair Bell <albell@UVIC.CA>
Subject: LVT/F GM engineers' pithy quotes
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More Friday Fun at other marques expense
Alistair
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Memorable quotes (author's paraphrase) gleaned from various GM
engineers and managers during a summer internship in Michigan.
"Hey wait a minute, this car has no speedo needle...oh, never
mind, I see it -- it's buried."
--heard on the 2-way radio as an engineer was
drag-racing her Buick Skylark on the dragstrip at
the GM Milford Proving Grounds.
"There's something terribly wrong with this car, I can't even
burn rubber with it."
--an engineer returning her Cadillac
Cimmarron after a brief test drive.
"This car's a dog!...well, maybe not"
--driving a Buick Skylark w/ 3300 V6 for the first
time.
"I'll put my money on Art...he used to be a drag racer."
--during a showdown drag-race between the H.O.
Quad-4 Cutlass Calais (180 hp), and a Pontiac
Grand Am SE Turbo (165 hp). [btw. Quad-4 won
hands-down]
"We don't even consider the Supra, RX-7, or 300ZX
competition, because they don't sell nearly as many units as
we do."
--CPC engineer commenting on Camaros and Firebirds
relative to the competition.
"The Buick buyer never wants to have to open his hood for
anything --he would rather have it permanently sealed."
--Buick marketing manager on demographics
"slow, 100 mph"
--sign posted at the end of the 5 mile north-south
straightaway, just prior to the turnaround loop,
at GM's Milford Proving Grounds
"I think you should read this."
--memo circulated to all engineers working on
Quad-4 project, attached to a copy of a very
negative review of the car in _Automobile
Magazine_
"We want a reputation for quality and value like that of
Honda."
--Chevrolet marketing manager
"Pontiac's trying to cultivate an image of excitement and
expressive sportiness...you know, kind of like Honda."
--Pontiac marketing manager
"Our goal is to be to the American market what Honda is to
the Japanese market."
--Buick marketing manager
"In the future, Oldsmobile will be attracting the younger,
more sophisticated buyers that are currently buying Hondas."
--Oldsmobile chief engineer
"These seatbelts suck!"
--unidentified engineer on GM's new passive belts