Date:         Tue, 1 Apr 2003 12:14:25 -0800
Reply-To:     Harald Rust <harald_nancy_vw@YAHOO.COM>
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From:         Harald Rust <harald_nancy_vw@YAHOO.COM>
Subject:      Vanagon and the Frying Chicken
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii

Vanagon and the frying chicken
This anecdote was sent to me by an old acquaintance,
Professor Schnapsgetrunken many years ago.
A very sad thing happened in the Southern Province
of Bayerngau, Germany.
A local resident took delivery of his new vehicle,
the latest German engineered marvel.
When he took his new dream auto on the
local back roads, he was overcome with
irrational exuberance bordering on ecstasy
as the vehicle approached 235 km per hour.
It was too late when he noticed the poor old duck
flying across the road, smashing into his windshield.
There was not much anyone could do for either of them.
Some people felt sorry for the duck, a few
for the driver, and many for both of them.
The German bureaucracy, always on the lookout
to improve vehicle safety, decided that something
should be done to “bird proof” new vehicles.
A new agency was formed, called
Bundesanstalt für Vögelnkollison in Flensberg.
The Tüv (Technishe Überwachungs Verrückte)
were assigned the task of inventing a cannon with
which to propel a farm-raised frying chicken
with the required velocity to test automotive
windshields.
The first auto company to test this new device was
one of the major luxury car manufacturers.
As the chicken hit the windshield, it bounced off,
and the vehicle was deemed safe.
Next it was our favorite car manufacturer’s
turn to test their vehicle’s windshield.
A beautiful new vanagon was chosen, placed
in position on the test range facing the cannon.
The poor fryer was loaded into the cannon,
and the tester was ready to pull the trigger.
All this in the name of saving human lives, of course.
The fryer accelerated out of the cannon,
smashed the windshield, tore the test dummy apart,
pierced through the seats, and exited through
the closed rear hatch.  A total disaster.
Everyone gasped with disappointment.
The experiment was repeated with the same results.
Finally a desperate phone call was made to the Tüv,
who invented the ingenous device.
The answer was:
“You must thaw the frying chicken before
shooting it with the cannon.”
Happy April Fools Day.
Harald
‘90 westy




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