Date: Tue, 25 Jan 2005 07:41:52 -0700
Reply-To: Larry Chase <roadguy@ROADHAUS.COM>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: Larry Chase <roadguy@ROADHAUS.COM>
Subject: Shipping a Vanagon tow hitch - a saga
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Volks,
Recently I had to ship a SA Vanagon Tow Hitch.
First step .. haul it down to UPS for an estimate .... $57.82
Ouch and a huge cha-ching, that won't do.
The damn thing was classified as "Over Sized" and of course this is code for
"I really hope you want to ship this, because its gonna cost you big bucks".
Back home after boxing and weighing, I went to USPS, FedEx and UPS web sites
and plugged in the numbers.
49"x28"13" at 42 lbs.
To be honest ... hauling this thing around it felt like 75 lbs.
I gotta get back to the gym.
Anyway ... these were the online shipping estimates:
UPS ground = $57.82 (just like they told me the other day)
USPS Parcel Post = $92.81
FedEx = $79.94
Then I started playing around with the dimensions of the package.
I stumbled on the fact that if I reduced the actual dimensions by one inch,
it would greatly change the cost of shipping with FedEx.
But it didn't change the cost with UPS or USPS.
So I figured it was worth a shot to see if I could get a sympathetic clerk.
Yesterday I walked into the main FedEx shipping center ..... Surveyed the
clerks and waited
for the one who had the most sympathetic face and cheeriest attitude.
As I approached the counter, and after a pleasant "hello and how are you
today" I announce
"We have a mission of great importance".
Really the clerk exclaimed!
Yes .... I went on to say "The difference between this package being
affordable and not affordable to ship
is a mere inch in the dimensions.
"We are on the cusp of success vs failure" I proclaimed.
What's in the strange looking package she asked ...
"Goal Post for a new infant football league" I spontaneously respond.
Fighting to hold back tears of laughter she began measuring.
As she stretched the tape across the first dimension a "accurate" number was
revealed, she looked at me.
Shaking my head ever so slightly left to right, so as to not attract
attention of a supervisor, I frown.
She began sliding the tape backwards .. ever so slowly. Once an inch of
precious dimension had been removed ... I smile clandestinely.
Beaming she writes down that dimension and begins the next measurement.
Repeating our secret ritual ... we end up with three dimensions that when
plugged into the
"Mysterious Shipping Calculator Computer Program" spit out a cost of $31.15
vs the previously
Estimated $79.94.
Both of us, now bonded by mutual mission, jubilantly finish the paper work
and end the transaction
with one last exchange.
"is it really a Goal Post for an new infant football league" the friendly
clerk asks.
I smile, wink and walk out.
Life is good when you can work the system.
Larry Chase
www.roadhaus.com