Date: Fri, 10 Jun 2005 14:12:17 -0700
Reply-To: John Bange <jbange@GMAIL.COM>
Sender: Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From: John Bange <jbange@GMAIL.COM>
Subject: Re: vanagon syndrome week - Friday
In-Reply-To: <000501c56de8$fb6508b0$6401a8c0@noner4688xfd1h>
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Hi, my name is John, and I have Vanagon Syndrome. It all started last
summer when I decided I was too old and grumpy to camp in a tent. So I
did a little research into camper vans and decided that the best
size-to-utility ratio to be had was with the Vanagon. That, plus the
legendary user-maintainability of rear-engine VW's sold me on the
idea. Little did I know how that decision would haunt me. Three weeks
and $2300 later I had a nice little '90 base model. I figured it'd
take a thousand or so dollars to get it ship-shape. Had the shocks and
fluids changed at a local garage for about $900, who then informed me
that it had an overheating problem that they couldn't figure out. He
recommended the local VW dealer. $1200 later, the stealership had
changed my radiator. OK, so it was a couple thousand initially. Then
came the first long trip. High winds on wobbly tires convinced me I
needed 16" wheels-- another $1100. A trip to Yosemite at night
convinced me I needed to rewire the headlights with a relay, and while
I'm at it, change the headlights to round E-code ones and get a South
African grill. Then on Christmas Day I snapped a head stud, and TRULY
developed full blown Vanagon Syndrome. Pulled the entire drive train
out and sent away for a Boston Bob engine and ordered a full set of
hoses ($4000+). While it's up, I may as well drop the fuel tank and
replace the grommets. Then I broke the auto tranny while "fixing" it,
so I sent for a rebuilt ($560). Can't put crap ATF in a rebuilt tranny
right? $80 worth of Redline coming up! Now I'm cleaning all the dirty
old parts that go on the new engine and spending about $100 a week
buying replacement parts for ones I consider to be of even slightly
suspicious reliability (which is an unsound decision sometimes, as
many parts come from the factory unreliable). The Vanagon still sits
in the garage, engine out, waiting to be reassembled. I promised my
wife that as soon as these last part come from Bus Depot
(under-the-pulley water pipe and the little elbow piece it connects to
on the right) I'll put it together for real. Fortunately, they appear
to be back-ordered (or at least slow in coming) which gives me more
time to clean the throttle body with a toothbrush and run that 8ga
copper wire ground bus I "need" from the engine compartment to the
battery, headlights, and dash area. Last week my wife said "if
something goes wrong and the new engine blows up, we're selling the
Vanagon for whatever we can get and cutting our losses". I was
surprised when no lightning bolt came from the sky to punish such a
heretical utterance. I assured her nothing would go wrong, but inside
my mind was gibbering. I think she knows, but still doesn't quite
understand, what it means to have Vanagon syndrome. I used to play the
lottery and think of what kind of fancy new car I'd buy if I won. Now
I imagine what sort of Syncro I'd get, and whether TWO Vanagons would
really be enough. I am reminded of a couple lines from the Black Flag
song "Six Pack":
My girl friend asks me which one I like better
I hope the answer won't upset her!
John "No, I never seen a toilet explode" Bange
'90 Vanagon "Geldsauger" -- over $11000 "invested"
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