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Date:         Fri, 2 Sep 2011 12:55:16 +0000
Reply-To:     J Stewart <fonman4277@COMCAST.NET>
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@gerry.vanagon.com>
From:         J Stewart <fonman4277@COMCAST.NET>
Subject:      Re: Friday: Tech Support
Comments: To: Hector Zapata <hlzapata@GMAIL.COM>
In-Reply-To:  <CAPDG_XLb4V9UXcrsiABbBsMmR5_CTsArJd0wHVpbqO_xMbcuhA@mail.gmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=utf-8

In my <sigh> 33 years as a telecommunications technician I have dealt with every one of these people. Right now I have an open ticket for a user who wants me to drive across the city (Washington, DC) just to swap the paper tag on her phone that shows what her extension number is....         Jeff 

Jeff Stewart

----- Original Message -----

This ought to make you feel better about  your computer skills!

Tech  support: What kind of computer do you have? Customer: A  white one...

Tech  support:  Click  on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left?

Customer:    Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find  printer'.  I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

Tech  support:    What's on your monitor now, ma'am? Customer:    A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

Customer:   My keyboard  is not working anymore. Tech  support:   Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer:   No. I can't  get behind the computer. Tech  support:    Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer: !   OK Tech support:   Did the  keyboard come with you? Customer:  Yes Tech support:   That means the keyboard  is not plugged in.

Customer:   I can't get on the Internet. Tech support:    Are you sure you used the right password? Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. Tech  support:  Can you tell me what the password was? Customer: Five dots.

Tech  support: What  anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program. Customer: Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer...

Customer:  I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

Tech support:    How may I help you? Customer:   I'm writing my first email. Tech support:    OK, and what seems to be the problem? Customer:   Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it?

This one and the next are our personal favorites!

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. Tech support:   Are you running it under windows? Customer:   'No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.'

And last but not least!

Tech  support: 'Okay Bob, let's  press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program  Manager.' Customer:   I don't have a P. Tech  support:   On your keyboard, Bob. Customer:   What do you mean? Tech support:   'P'.....on  your keyboard, Bob. Customer:   I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!


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