Date:         Tue, 9 May 1995 12:38:28 -0700
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@vanagon.com>
From:         nrubin@s1.csuhayward.edu (Martha Rubin)
Subject:      kinda car related


Well, ok, it may not be VW stuff, but at least it's "traffic-related"  :)

-

 The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams
given  by the California Department of Transportation's driving school
(that is, Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)

  Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
  A: What for?  He can't see my license plate.

  Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop
   at the same time?
  A: The pickup truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker
   saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."

 Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your
  car?
  A: Always wear a condom.

  Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
  A: Your car.

  Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
  A: Be  too sh*t-faced to find your keys.

  Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk
        driving?
  A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

  Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer
   drive lawfully?
  A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

  Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
 A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.

  Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a
   flashing yellow traffic light?
  A: The color.

  Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
  A: Heavy psychedelics.

  Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
  A: Carry loaded weapons.

  Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
  A: It would be tough to be a d*ckhead all day long.