Date:         Mon, 4 Mar 1996 23:13:37 -0800
Sender:       Vanagon Mailing List <vanagon@vanagon.com>
From:         amunro@amunro.seanet.com (Alex Munro)
Subject:      Re: The dreaded ZOONING gestapo, what to do?

Warning:  the following material is not suitable for viewing by passive types.

soapbox mode ON

At 06:28 PM 3/4/96 -0600, jag@cs.rochester.edu wrote:
>What do you do to get the dreaded zooning police off your back?

>My neighbor on the opposite side of the
>street had his Triumph TR6 towed, 

He put up with that?  My '79 westy is in my yard right now with no motor and
expired tabs. It is my personal property. I own it. Not the city.  I'll get
tabs for it again when I'm ready to drive it off of MY property.

Any loser with a clip board and a tow truck who attempts to remove it from
my property will be guilty of theft, plain and simple.  My states
Constitution would allow use of deadly force to stop such a crime, though
I'm much more creative than that.

Those of us who used to get stoned _after_ American History may remember the
Constitution and the Bill of Rights.  Specifically the fourth amendement
gaurding us from unreasonable search and SIEZURE.  I would consider it my
duty as an American citizen to fight a rediculous zoning law created by
people who can afford a new Lexus every two years.

>and another neighbor had two cars 
>towed and even got sued by the town.
>

Sounds like a nice place to be FROM.


>I can afford registration, but I cannot afford to insure them,
>and NY laws says registered cars have to be insured (or they'll
>suspend my licence). Until now I've put out of state plates on my 
>unoperative vehichles to avoid having them towed, but I suspect they 
>will eventually figure that one out too. Hey, last year they even made 
>a big stink about my SO having a few ducks in our back yard, and made 
>us get rid of them. (Although I didn't mind eating them).

Geez, you don't live in that town where it's illegal to park a pick up in
front of your house do you?

>Do you know of any creative solutions to the zooning regulation
>problem? Bob Hufford mentions he has historic plates on some of his
>busses. Does NY have this? How old does the vehicle have to be?
>Do you need insurance also?
>
If I remember the thread from months past on the new emmision laws in NY &
NJ, there is no work around for a historic, classic or custom type car.  A
'64 Mustang with 20 miles on it needs to be registered EVEN IN YOUR GARAGE.

Here's what I'd do:

I'd move my most derelict parts car out next to the street.  First, however,
I'd get someone with a back-hoe to dig a VW sized hole in the intended
parking spot.  Next, I'd get a few pieces of railroad track and stick them
upright so that about two feet of each piece sticks up.  Then pour the hole
full of cement.  Park the bus on top and weld the crap out of it.  Grind off
the serial numbers and smoke the title while chanting things in German.

That should keep it there until the next step is complete:

Get each of us to mail you $1.00, as part of a contract to make a religious
sculpture owned by the Vanagon list.  If your city then attempts to remove
it they will be guilty of destroying OUR property.  We'll each file a suit
in small claims court claiming they've destroyed our sacred temple.  That
should fix their Volkswagon...


----------------------------------------------------------------
Alex Munro
amunro@amunro.seanet.com